Your life story…

You are who you choose to be. You can do whatever it is you decide to do in this life. You are not who or what others think or say you are. You are not other’s opinions, unless you actually decide to be. You and only you walk in your footsteps, think with your brain, and make the choices each moment of the day that shape YOU!!!

People can think or say whatever they want. They can tell stories. They can judge. They can talk all they want. What you listen to is your choice, and your choice alone. Truth is those who generally do, are too afraid to focus on themselves and their own lives. Rather than doing so, afraid of what they might find, they often attack other’s lives, and choices and make judgements. There are many people out there that cannot truly stand the sight of their own reflection. Referring to their true reflection; not just what shows in the mirror, but what lies within. In order to avoid that reflection, they deflect the attention onto others.

It is never our place to judge another. We are not anyones judge or jury in this life. We are only our own. Other people thoughts of you, are their to have. Just as your thoughts of them are yours to have. At the end of the day the only persons life and choices that should matter to you are your own. It’s you that has to live with yourself. Be someone worth living with. Be someone who can truly embrace your own reflection. And if you don’t right now, then choose to change whatever it is about yourself that you aren’t happy with.

It’s pretty simply, you are the writer of your life story. You can write it any way that you choose. Let each person be the writer or their own life story. You don’t even have to read their story, should you choose not too. And they need not read yours. The only way someone else writes your life story, is if you allow them to do so. When you are in a good place with yourself, when you understand your choices, values and motivations behind the choices you make, and the actions you take, it all makes sense. And you realize how others see or think of you, really isn’t your concern. How your choices and actions affect others of course is always a concern. You can’t think only of yourself, and not care how what you do can possibly hurt someone else. Your every thought and action goes out into the world, and travels far beyond only your life…

Care less about what others think, say or do, and care more about what you think, say or do. Free yourself of the burden of carrying other people’s version of you, and embrace who it is you really are.

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Do something about it!!!

I had a conversation the other day with someone. I found it worth sharing. This person told me, OMG I can’t imagine not having my leg. How do you do it every day? The pain, all the surgeries. Shit you kicked as through cancer. And now all of this just keeps coming. She then said I’ve never been through any hard shit in my life, the way you have. My biggest gripe is that my husband is a jerk, treats me like crap, and we haven’t had love for so long. And I hate my job. But damn compared to all you’ve been through, I really can’t complain. I can’t imagine how you’ve dealt with the pain for so long and still do. How is it you are always smiling? I started laughing, and said I think that is actually the other way around. She said what do you mean? I said it’s me that can’t imagine how you do it. She said huh? I said I just lost a leg, you however get up every day and go to a job you can’t stand for 8-10 hours a day, and then you come home to someone you can’t stand as well. That’s a HUGE waste of a day, every single day. It’s a waste of a life. I may not have my leg, and I may live with a great deal of pain, but I live every single day so crazy happy. I love my work, I love my family. I love that I not only share my life with a man who is my best friend, who I am crazy in love with, but also who I still really like. haha. Seriously, I got it easy woman, it’s your life I can’t imagine living.

She was silent for a minute. Then I said, the saddest part of it all is that you can choose to change the things you aren’t happy with. I can’t grow my leg back, I can’t choose for all to heal any quicker than life and myself heals it. But you choose to go to work everyday and hate what you do… And you choose to spend your life married to someone that you aren’t happy in the slightest with. Both issues are a choice, and not a circumstance that isn’t within your control. Life again always going back to being far more about the choices we make, than the circumstances that may occur. Life is too short to live it unhappy. Home and work are where you spend majority of your time. The rest of it sleeping. So who the hell wants to waste such a precious gift? If you aren’t happy in this life, DO something about it. And don’t ever assume that just cause someone has suffered a loss that they aren’t happy…

I’ve been through much in my life, as have so many in this life…I live a life without regrets, never focused on what has come before, always looking straight ahead, and appreciating every breath. I’ve been unhappy with a job, been unhappy with a person… I did something about it. You always have a choice. Even in the roughest of circumstances, you always have a choice.

I know people who live their lives in prisons, in hospitals, in many situations that aren’t that which would be ideal. And some I have to tell you are far happier than those who have freedom, good health, and life gifted to them every single day in the free world. How crazy is that? You know why this is…? Cause they are at peace with where they are in this very day. Because they have found that even though they may not be able to control where they are, because of some bad choices of the past, or because of illnesses they can’t control, they know they control the way they deal with it and the they control how they allow things to make them feel, and the choices they make.

Bottom line, look at your life. Look really well, and if there are things you aren’t happy with, then figure out what you need to do in order to change that. You are in the drivers seat of your life. You can’t just have in the greater source above to do it all for you. You have to have faith in the power you were created with to do for YOU as well.


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Embrace the uniqueness that is YOU!!!

Embrace the uniqueness that is YOU. There is no other out there who is identical to who you are… Even if you have a twin, there is something, somewhere, whether seen on the outside or not, that makes you unique… No two spirits are the same. No two souls are equal. And no two hearts are exact. Often people don’t know themselves well enough to even begin to comprehend owning their uniqueness. Nickname for such people hubby and I have is “sheeple”… They just go along with the herd and all blend in as one in the same. Screw the herd. Be who you are. Love who you are. Be proud of who you are. Rock who you are…

The world is full of fakers, or simply those who are confused or lack confidence in who they are. How can they embrace it, if they don’t even know who and what it is they are embracing. They take on other identities. I don’t mean identity fraud, although that happens plenty too. I mean more in the sense of pretending to be into things they aren’t. Having knowledge they don’t, simply to impress others. This is no way to live. And in the end people see through the make believe. Some people even end up lost in their own lies, creations, and stories they share. So afraid to scratch the surface and see what is really there, they just pretend to be what they think will impress others. This my friends is a waste of time, a waste of life, and a waste of all that you were created to be…

How many people do you know personally who start dating someone and they pretend to have all the same interests of the partner they are seeing. Oh I just love rap music. Oh I surf all the time. I love blood and gore movies. Then they get comfy and more serious in the relationship and they change the radio station to country, partner is like wtf, and girl says OMG I hate rap music. LOL. Go to the movies she wants to see a chic flic and protests the blood and gore that she once claimed was so awesome… Or the guy who claimed to love romantic comedies, now says they put him to sleep. lol. Girl says she loves to surf, loves big waves, take her out to surf, she paddles out and pukes all her guts scared shitless.

I have a dear friend, she’s a vegan… Perfect example. Meets a guy she really likes, they go to a nice restaurant and he asked if he could order for her, as it was a place he’d been going to for years. She says sure… She says nothing else, such as a simply reply of sure, but please note that I am a vegan. He orders her the steak… She eats it. 20 years vegan, but eats the steak, cause she really liked him and wanted him to like her back. Calls me and is throwing up and so sick from eating it. I said wtf? She went on and on about how great it he is… 3 months later it’s over. Why because she tells him the truth that she is a vegan. His point, she couldn’t be honest from day one, so what point is there going forward, and what else had she been honest about. She spend months eating meat, simply because he likes meat… How could he be in love with her, when he now knows he doesn’t really know her at all. She was pretending to like everything he did. No thoughts, opinions, choices of her own. Trying to fit in… Wanting so desperately to be liked.

The only person you need to fit in with, is YOU. The only persons skin you wear is your own. Get comfy in it. And if you aren’t then make the changes you need too for YOU. Don’t conform or front to be that which you are not. If you have so little confidence that someone will like or accept you for you, then it’s you that needs to work on your love and respect for yourself. And if someone doesn’t, then bye bye, they weren’t someone you needed in your life to begin with.

Being unique is what you were created to be… Embrace it with all you are. Worry less about what anyone else thinks of you, and be someone who loves you, for YOU… In doing so you will find the type of people you attract to your life, are the type of people you want in your life. When you truly know you, others will want to as well. Be proud to be you. Realize the gift that you truly are, and how blessed anyone, family, friends, or partners would be in this life to know you… to love you… and the peace of mind you have at knowing it is in fact YOU that they care for, and not someone you are pretending to be.

Me n Bman

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